My New English Vocabulary

I teach elementary English as a second language. I struggle daily to help children understand the nuances of the word take. Needless to say, I had consigned myself to a year of advanced English retreating. It is then an understandable surprise that I've noticed certain expansions in my vocabulary. Unfortunately, these words are not necessarily accepted or understood by the mainstream public. This is my first step in socializing the Konglish that has become such a part of my daily life.

Service
pronunciation: suh- as in 'suck'; -bee- as in the animal; -si as in the first syllable in 'swish' when we colloquially elongate it for effect

This one has been part of the repertoire for quite some time, but it's important to make the distinction. When Americans talk about the service at a particular restaurant, we are referring to a complex combination of server attitude, attention to detail, promptness, and overall dining experience. Korea takes a much more direct approach to the matter: service means free stuff. If I go to a restaurant and order, they will bring me a free cola. The waiter denoting that it is "service" is the social clue that I will not be charged for the Coke.

The practice does not stop at the dinner mint, however. If I get a fill up at a gas station, the attendant may give me a free packet of tissues for my car. "Service." If I'm at a karaoke room and I've paid for an hour but 30 more minutes magically appear on the clock, the monitor will inform me: "Service." If I pick up a prescription at the pharmacy and the clerk gives me a toothpaste sample, "service."

Consequently, this has made other imported phrases uncomfortable or impossible. "Self service," for example, because the awkwardly truncated and somewhat philosophical "Water is Self."

Hacking/Cunning
pronunciation: Heck-keeng and Cun-neeng

Hacking is of course the extremely 90's practice of infiltrating personal computer files and illicit programs, and cunning is the slightly less negative sly. A gerund and an adjective, respectively. In Korea, however, these words are synonymous. For that to be the case, they would also have to be identical parts of speech. In a true diplomatic fashion, they compromise and both become nouns. In Korean as well as in broken English, one literally "does hacking" or "does cunning."

This pair has been morphed to mean cheating. It is most predominant during quizzes when a student is taking a quiz and looks at a peer's paper. I have also seen it used in the context of a cheat sheet, or "cunning paper." There's a standardized test prep series called "TOEFL Hacking."

Interestingly, these terms do not apply for changing one's answers after grading (in which they simply label that student a "Sagee" or fraud) or for plagiarism (which they do not recognize as wrong on any level.)

Fishing
pronunciation: peesh-eeng

It's not a sport, unless you consider Ashton Kutcher's behavior on Punked to be athletic. In Korea, when you say something opposite of what you mean in order to fool someone, you follow the awkward silence that ensues with "I fished you," or simply "Fishing." It's greatly similar to phrases such as "I'm just pulling your chain," "Gotchya," or everyone's 1990's favorite "Psych."

Examples of fishing include, but are not limited to:
What's that on the ceiling? [nothing is on the ceiling] Fishing!

Teacher, I didn't bring my book today...I'm fishing!

I keep an extra refrigerator in my home to store the bodies. I just fished you!

A: You're fat!
B: You're mom's fat!
A: Not cool, my Mom's got breast cancer.
B: Dude, quit fishing me.